Last time I had a photo taken of my aura, it was grey.

I’m off to the desert to dry out for a month.

No access to the interweb or the emails while I’m away, so I leave you with a picture of the pretty airport in Gander.

Rose Bakery

This is my new favorite cookbook. I haven’t actually bought it yet, I just look at the pictures in the book store and pretend that I live in Paris, even though I could never live in Paris because I am deeply insecure and I always feel clumsy and stupid around the French people.

But if I could live there, I would eat at this place every day.

Helena Christensen has hair and skin superpowers which makes her an ideal candidate for my new best friend.

I’m not super crazy about models, and I was never particularly into this girl when she was one, but now I’ve got some kinda girl crush on Helena Christensen. She is so pretty. Do you think that if I had a special event to go to she would come over and do my hair? Cause I have like five weddings to attend this summer.

God, even standing next to wankers like Kate Bosworth and Michael Stipe doesn’t diminish her beauty.

This was advertised as a good Mother’s day gift. But really, potted chrysanthemums work just as well.

So, this one’s for the fellas. And the ladies who love ladies. It’s a piece of advice.

If you see this cream in a girl’s medicine cabinet (though for $230 a jar, I would put it on the mantle piece) run. It doesn’t even try to hide the fact, it’s all in the name: High Maintenance Cream. I’ll say.

British girls do it better

The big difference between UK Vogue and US Vogue is in the hair. British Vogue staffers are not opposed to messy hair and as we all know, messy hair equals superior product.

UK Vogue:

US Vogue:

Who would you rather hang out with? The American Vogue girls look like they will never put out no matter how many drinks you buy them.

file under: dudes, bodypaint, “classy”

So, this is a picture of some restaurant in Whistler:

And this is a picture of some restaurant in LA:

And All I can think is, really? Is this erotic to somebody? I mean other than some Maxim magazine kinda guys who will be all “Dude, we totally ate sushi off some chick’s tits last night!”

Also, I don’t think a chocolate stained pillow is that erotic either, I mean unless you’re in to scat.

Seriously, some people are so rich.

And the flaky rich ones build elaborate adult tree-houses. It kinda makes me feel sick. But I would like to sleep one night in this flaky rich person’s tree-bed in France. Just once. Just to see what it feels like to be flaky and rich.

Finland is for Lovers

Yesterday I bought the most beautiful Ivana Helsinki dress from Eugene Choo.

Later, I bought a tin enamel sugar bowl and creamer for a dollar at 3 Vets. I got the same amount of pleasure from both purchases.

Now if I could just figure out how to wear the creamer and sugar bowl with the dress, I think I might have a perfect outfit.

The Orville Redenbacher Effect

Long the accessory of man-child pundits that no one would have sex with in a million years, the bow tie is (I think) being reclaimed. I have thought for a while now that the bow tie could make a comeback. And it is upon us. To wit, here is a photo of the Tom Ford store opening in NYC.

I would shag the guy on the far left (not so much his friend) if he wasn’t queer. And a male model.

Martina Gedeck

I just saw The Lives of Others. It’s so good it makes me want to forget every other movie I’ve seen this year. I can’t even talk about it. But let me just say that if East Berlin circa 1984 is not the hottest look for ladies this fall then I don’t know what I’m talking about. I need to buy blue eye shadow.

Also, this could turn into a Martina Gedeck fan site.